WOMEN LEADING WOMEN, TAKE NOTE!
The Contemplative Mom works great as a book study!
In fact, many women's and moms' groups around the country have discovered how much encouragement and discussion among women comes from using The Contemplative Mom in this way.
One group called "MODELS," a ministry of Sunset Presbyterian Church in Portland, Oregon, created a companion study guide to The Contemplative Mom complete with questions and activities to supplement their book study.
They agreed to have this available to other leaders and individuals through this website. Elissa Thomasini, MODELS Director, brought me in to kick off their study. I got permission to post the story of how she discovered The Contemplative Mom:
TESTIMONIAL
I feel so
privileged to introduce Ann Kroeker to you. I first heard about Ann as
I was looking for books for MODELS. After reading at least 25 books I
came upon The Contemplative Mom: Restoring Rich Relationship with
God in the Midst of Motherhood. I fell in love with it immediately.
Her book shared about really connecting with God in an intimate way.
Each chapter includes pages of scripture to reflect on, comments from other moms, and practical ways to grow closer to God. I felt that if our women read this book, they would be changed. So the MODELS leadership team chose to study Ann's book this fall.
Then the special events leader for MODELS had a vision of having an author speak at MODELS. This sounded like a good idea so I decided to try and track Ann Kroeker down. I didn't see any contact information for her in the book but I remembered her mentioning a thank you to her pastor in the acknowledgements section of her book. So I did a search on the Internet for Grace Community Church in Indiana and sent the pastor an e-mail which he forwarded to Ann.
Since then
Ann and I have had numerous conversations through e-mail, instant
messaging and on the phone. It's through those conversations that I've
learned a lot about her. I found out that she studied English literature
in college. She lives in Indiana with her husband and four young children
and she volunteers at her church with worship and arts. Ann's got a great
sense of humor. She's considerate and loving to others. And she's a
powerful prayer warrior. She is truly devoted to her kids. And the
greatest thing is that she desires more than anything else to be used by
God and to have an intimate relationship with Him. I feel so fortunate to
have Ann as my friend and sister in Christ. I hope you will be inspired by
her words of wisdom and passion for God as much as I have been.
—Elissa Tomasini
Also available in this section are additional suggestions and questions that have been generated since the book's release. Leaders looking for creative gatherings as they minister to moms should browse the free resources offered here.
THE
CONTEMPLATIVE COMPANION STUDY GUIDE
Created for group study to accompany The Contemplative Mom.
Click here for a PDF file of the MODELS Study Guide
ADDITIONAL IDEAS
FOR BOOK STUDY GROUPS
Here are
additional ideas that could be merged with the Contemplative Companion Study
Guide. I hope one day to merge these into one document. In the meantime, you
may wish to print out a copy of this as well as the pdf file above and pull
together the ideas for your group study.
Note
to Leaders
This section provides overall ideas and encouragement to leaders planning
a group study. Suggestions and motivations for utilizing the book and
pulling together outside material for each week/session will be covered.
This is an interactive study that can incorporate PowerPoint, if the leader
has access to that, or alternatives to that technology (such as overhead
projector slides or even simple handouts). Also included are possibilities
for combining weeks to plan a shorter study.
Note
to Participants
This section addresses those who are using the materials in a class setting
or alone. Specific suggestions will be provided to best use the materials
and make the most of the weeks. An individual reader working alone will
receive thoughts from the author to encourage her that she is not alone
in her pursuit of God while parenting.
WEEK
1: Introduction
The recommended format for each week is to begin with a small group time,
combine to a large group, then send reader-participants off to enjoy a
time of solitude. At the end of the material, various homework options
for the following week are offered.
SMALL GROUP
Each week’s small group will begin by following a pattern with open-ended
questions of increasing spiritual depth relating to the assigned chapter
in The Contemplative Mom. Small group leaders can use these as discussion
builders, as each participant records her responses, beginning a record
of her journey. In a group setting, small group leaders will pose these
questions. An individual mom using the material on her own can use these
as journal prompts.
Activities to launch the study will be provided. The first week assumes no reading has taken place. It asks introductory questions exploring the expectations and hopes of the reader/participant, and makes the first assignment for the following week.
The use of journals will be strongly encouraged. Some groups may wish to provide the participants with a gift of a journal for each woman. Others may want to encourage each mom to find a journal that fits her own personality. Journals will be used at length, even for the non-writers in the group; they are an essential part of the experience.
IDEAS
& ACTIVITIES
Depending on the style and mood of the group, additional games and activities
might be appropriate for either the large or small group. Leaders can
pick and choose from suggestions included here that would be suitable
for the topic of the week. These can serve as a thought-provoking opener,
add a little light-hearted humor or simply be a non-traditional conversation
starter. Examples follow:
- Read the story of the wedding banquet found on pages 48-49 of Philip Yancey’s book, What’s So Amazing about Grace? This is the invitation we all have to a life of rich relationship with the Father. He is inviting us to a banquet, a feast. That’s what this course is, too, an invitation to dine with the Father Himself, to feast on all He has to offer.
- Play “The Invitation,” cut #7 from Steven Curtis Chapman’s CD “Speechless.” Build around the idea that not only are you inviting these moms to something rich and deep, but also—and more importantly—the Lord Himself is.
- Print and pass out invitations as if to a party with the chorus from the song on it and verses of Jesus saying, “Come to me…” (provided in text).
- Play “Thirsty,” cut # 9 from Chris Rice’s CD “Past the Edges.” Discuss the thirst for “something more.” Is that why you’ve come to this course? Seeking something more? Put John 6:35 and/or 7:37 on slides. Explore the thirst and hunger for something more—something richer and more intimate—with the Lord.
LARGE
GROUP
To launch the study, a coordinator/leader/speaker will explain logistics
and materials needed for the course. A short section with additional thoughts
from the author will be provided in each “Large Group” section.
The coordinator/speaker can use this to launch a message of her own (drawing
ideas from the “Ideas and Activities” list, as well), or extend
small group and solitude time and use large group gatherings for administrative
details, merely highlighting the “thoughts from the author”
or “thoughts from a fellow contemplative” section.
SOLITUDE
Moms signing up for a “Contemplative Moms” course will likely
be enjoying quality childcare that allows her a few rare moments without
the interruption of her small children. Take advantage of this! Don’t
miss out on this chance to give moms the gift of solitude! By retreating
to corners in the room or merely observing silence and centering right
where they sit, moms will conclude each week of the study with a chunk
of solitude. The first week, leaders may offer suggestions provided in
the material to help participants who are unaccustomed to solitude from
feeling overwhelmed.
ON
YOUR OWN (Homework)
Assignment: Each participant shops for a journal that fits her personality,
and writes answers to the questions provided in this chapter, which will
include questions about expectations for this course, her spiritual life,
or concerns and questions about journaling, the contemplative life, etc.
(Some groups may choose to give journals as a gift, and this assignment
would be adapted accordingly.)
Design note: perhaps the study guide could be designed to feel more like
an attractive journal than a study guide, with plenty of blank pages interwoven
with the printed material, so that readers can weave their personal thoughts
and responses in with the questions. Or a blank-book/journal could be
printed with a similar cover and the study guide and journal could be
shrink-wrapped and sold together.
WEEK
2: Panel or Interviews
SMALL GROUP
Contemplative Report/Review
No mom should be put on the spot, but if she’s been able to tackle
the assignment from the previous week, she can offer thoughts in the safety
of her small group. In this case, a series of open-ended questions will
allow small group discussion leaders to start broad and non-threatening,
and ease into greater spiritual depth as she senses the group will allow.
Expectations, hopes, fears and concerns will be addressed. Discussing
the journal-shopping, if journals aren’t provided, can form a fun
time of storytelling.
IDEAS
& ACTIVITIES
Depending on the style and mood of the group, additional games and activities
might be appropriate for either the large or small group. Leaders can
pick and choose from suggestions included here that would be suitable
for the topic of the week. These can serve as an opener, add a little
light-hearted humor or simply be a non-traditional conversation starter.
LARGE
GROUP
This week begins with a panel of moms or personal interviews that allow
readers to find moms in their own circle of influence from whom they would
like to learn. Mirroring the “Moms Speak Out” sections in
The Contemplative Mom, the leader will handpick a panel of moms who will
answer questions provided in this chapter, and then be open for Q&A.
Panel moms would include experienced moms and grandmothers in the church
or community who are established and respected as mentors and leaders.
Perhaps the leader herself and her own mom, a pastor’s wife or women’s
ministry director could be starting points for contacts as you build a
great panel.
SOLITUDE
A time of solitude follows the group time. This can be extended, based
on the needs of each group.
ON
YOUR OWN (Homework):
In addition to exploring the questions provided in the material, the assignment
for a group participant to tackle on her own is to think of two or three
women she admires and contact them by e-mail or phone. If they are local,
she can have them over for coffee or tea and pick their minds using some
of the questions the interviewer posed to the panel (provided in the study).
In effect, the reader will conduct her own personalized interview, asking
questions that relate to the details of her life. Participants take notes
to share next week with her small group, recording them in their journals.
WEEK
3: Rich Relationship
SMALL GROUP
Contemplative Report/Review
[Correlates with Chapter 1 in The Contemplative Mom.]
(Depending on timing, a study leader could eliminate the panel-interview
week and begin here. From this week until the end, the chapters of the
study will follow the chapters of the book. It is assumed that the reader
has access to The Contemplative Mom, and will be able to refer to the
book.)
Small groups share noteworthy answers from their personal interviews as well as things that stood out during the panel from last week. Also, they may share their responses to the study questions for Chapter 1. Discussion questions will be provided to help guide this time. Short, related daily suggestions will be made within each week’s section, utilizing suggestions in The Contemplative Mom and new material, as well.
“Our Richest Relationship” is the chapter topic from The Contemplative Mom for this week, and participants will consider the passionate love that the Lord has for them. Grasping the extent of that love He has for us and the fact that He pursues intimacy with us, is foundational to the course.
IDEAS
& ACTIVITIES
Depending on the style and mood of the group, additional games and activities
might be appropriate for either the large or small group. Leaders can
pick and choose from suggestions included here that would be suitable
for the topic of the week. These can serve as an opener, add a little
light-hearted humor or simply be a non-traditional conversation starter.
Here are a few:
- List on a white board traits of or things you would do with a best friend. Participants spontaneously throw out ideas. How many of these are applicable to the Lord? Circle those you think work with any Bible reference that comes to mind, if any.
- Listen to “How Is It between Us?” cut #7 on Sara Groves’ CD “Conversations.” When did we talk with the Lord last, and what has happened since? Work this into solitude later, as well as a large-group discussion.
- Sing or play the hymn “Be Thou My Vision.”
LARGE GROUP TIME
A brief, written section is included for each chapter/topic. The leader
may wish to prepare a short message, using the written section as a launching
point. This portion enhances, rather than repeats, what is in the assigned
chapter of the original book. A section will be included with “thoughts
from the author” or “thoughts from a fellow contemplative.”
Q&A: Leader is available for Q&A, and opens it up to the group
where appropriate.
SOLITUDE
A time of solitude is incorporated into each week.
ON
YOUR OWN (Homework):
Read Chapter 2 in the original book and respond to the study questions.
One part of the assignment will be to try to find some time to spend in
solitude and use the plan in the original book to experience a first-time-out
with the Lord.
WEEK
4: Time Alone
[Correlates with Chapter 2 in The Contemplative Mom.]
SMALL GROUP
Contemplative Report/Review
After discussing how participants have applied last week’s suggestions,
small groups or individuals will zero in on this chapter devoted to finding
a chunk of time for solitude. Group participants will help each other
come up with creative solutions to finding time alone with the Lord. Questions
will help each reader determine the roadblocks hindering her time with
the Lord, and help her generate her own list of ideas for overcoming those
roadblocks. Also, anyone who feels comfortable can share the details of
her first time out experiencing solitude. These experiences could be very
personal, so discussion shouldn’t be forced. But it could help to
talk about how awkward someone felt, or how it didn’t live up to
her expectations. That would free others to realize it doesn’t always
go as we hope, yet God is pleased and is there, even in silence and awkwardness.
IDEAS
& ACTIVITIES
Depending on the style and mood of the group, additional games and activities
might be appropriate for either the large or small group. Leaders can
pick and choose from suggestions included here that would be suitable
for the topic of the week. These can serve as an opener, add a little
light-hearted humor or simply be a non-traditional conversation starter.
LARGE
GROUP
Content will be included for the leader/speaker to use as a starting point
to develop a full-blown message if she likes. A section will be included
with “thoughts from the author” or “thoughts from a
fellow contemplative.” This week, the leader may wish to keep the
message to a minimum, in order to maximize the time of solitude for her
class participants. If they weren’t able to secure a chunk of time
the week prior, this can be a gift to give them bonus time.
Q&A: Leader is available for Q&A, and opens it up to the group
where appropriate.
SOLITUDE
Modify suggestions from the section subtitled in The Contemplative Mom,
“Now That I’m Alone with God, What Do I Do?” Send participants
off for a self-led, indoor retreat. Solitude is extended this week if
at all possible.
ON
YOUR OWN (Homework):
Read Chapter 3 on Divine Companionship, and complete the questions provided
in the study guide. Inventory existing multi-sensory reminders in the
home. Look for places to display new items and think differently—and
more frequently—about God’s presence.
WEEK
5: Divine Companionship
[Correlates with Chapter 3 in The Contemplative Mom]
SMALL GROUP
Contemplative Report/Review
Questions relating to both last and this week’s topic will be discussed.
IDEAS
& ACTIVITIES
Depending on the style and mood of the group, additional games and activities
might be appropriate for either the large or small group. Leaders can
pick and choose from suggestions included here that would be suitable
for the topic of the week. These can serve as an opener, add a little
light-hearted humor or simply be a non-traditional conversation starter.
Ideas would be similar to these:
- Have a time set to go off repeatedly throughout the study (on the half-hour, every 15 minutes). Each time it beeps, everyone pauses. Leaders may offer a few suggestions for what might be said/ thought/prayed during that pause, or leave it up to the individual to decide for herself.
- Leader or small group leaders bring in a bag of reminders in their lives that keep them connected with God throughout a day. Set up a display for people to see as they walk in.
- Hang posters made by children around the walls of the room where you meet. The artwork could be Bible stories read to children who interpret them visually. This could be coordinated with a Sunday school class.
- Find something that would be a reminder for every sense, and then give them away at the end of this session. Attach a strip of paper with Scripture references that expand the meaning. If you give out candles, for example, find passages that speak of the Lord as our light, or God’s word as a light. Pass out a natural item like acorns with Isaiah 61:3 “They will be called oaks of righteousness.”
- Purchase postcards online of da Vinci’s “The Last Supper” to pass out.
- Dig up a field lily for each mom she can plant in her garden, and print out simple labels for each pot with Matthew 6:28-30 (why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow…)
- Read p. 49-51 in Currents of the Heart: Glimpses of God in the Stream of Life, by Gigi Graham Tchividjian. It is an excerpt from the diary of a French maid in the 17th Century. It is a powerful illustration of staying aware of God’s divine presence and love in the midst of the mundane.
LARGE
GROUP
PowerPoint slide possibilities:
"If Christ does not reign over the mundane events in our lives,
He does not reign at all.”
-- Dr. Paul Tripp
This section includes “thoughts from the author” or “thoughts
from a fellow contemplative” and quotations that can be put to PowerPoint
and other related information to the topic. Leader is available for Q&A,
and opens it up to the group where appropriate.
SOLITUDE
Again, moms in the class are given a chunk of time to experience solitude.
They are encouraged to explore the concept of divine companionship. “Prompts”
will be provided for those who desire more direction in their journals.
ON
YOUR OWN (Homework):
Assignments for the following week are included along with questions to
prepare them to explore the topic of prayer and talking to God.
WEEK
6: Talking to God
[Correlates with Chapter 4 in The Contemplative Mom.]
SMALL GROUP
Contemplative Report/Review
Questions relating to both last and this week’s topic will be discussed.
IDEAS
& ACTIVITIES
Depending on the style and mood of the group, additional games and activities
might be appropriate for either the large or small group. Leaders can
pick and choose from suggestions included here that would be suitable
for the topic of the week. These can serve as an opener, add a little
light-hearted humor or simply be a non-traditional conversation starter.
LARGE
GROUP
A section will be included with “thoughts from the author”
or “thoughts from a fellow contemplative.”
Q&A: Leader is available for Q&A, and opens it up to the group
where appropriate.
SOLITUDE
Women spend time pouring out their hearts to God in silence and solitude.
ON
YOUR OWN (Homework):
Assignments for the following week are included along with questions to
prepare them to explore the topic of prayer and listening to God.
WEEK
7: Listening to God
[Correlates with Chapter 5 in The Contemplative Mom.]
SMALL GROUP
Contemplative Report/Review
Questions relating to both last and this week’s topic will be discussed.
IDEAS
& ACTIVITIES
Depending on the style and mood of the group, additional games and activities
might be appropriate for either the large or small group. Leaders can
pick and choose from suggestions included here that would be suitable
for the topic of the week. These can serve as an opener, add a little
light-hearted humor or simply be a non-traditional conversation starter.
Examples follow.
- Play “He Is Not Silent,” cut # 11 on Out of the Grey’s CD “Remember This-The Out of the Grey Collection.” Discuss whether or not we feel we have been listening well; Have we turned away?
- Find someone willing to do the humorous monologue of a young mom trying to keep from being distracted during her time of solitude. Script is available through Willow Creek Community Church: “Quiet Time?” drama available through their website at: http://www.willowcreek.com/product.asp?InvtID=PR00468&action=details
- Play “The Word,” cut #2 on Sara Groves CD “Conversations.” Use it to discuss the importance of turning to the written word of God to really hear from God.
- Sing of play the chorus, “Thy Word.”
LARGE
GROUP
A section will be included with “thoughts from the author”
or “thoughts from a fellow contemplative.”
Q&A: Leader is available for Q&A, and opens it up to the group
where appropriate.
SOLITUDE
After emphasizing the importance of silence, leaders dismiss moms to their
spots to listen to the Lord.
ON
YOUR OWN (Homework):
Assignments for the following week are included along with questions to
prepare them to explore the topic of prayer and taking God’s advice.
WEEK
8: Taking His Advice
[Correlates with Chapter 6 in The Contemplative Mom.]
SMALL GROUP
Contemplative Report/Review
Questions relating to both last and this week’s topic will be discussed.
IDEAS
& ACTIVITIES
Depending on the style and mood of the group, additional games and activities
might be appropriate for either the large or small group. Leaders can
pick and choose from suggestions included here that would be suitable
for the topic of the week. These can serve as an opener, add a little
light-hearted humor or simply be a non-traditional conversation starter.
See examples below:
- Allow for a moment of confession. Use the formal confession from The Book of Common Prayer.
LARGE
GROUP
A section will be included with “thoughts from the author”
or “thoughts from a fellow contemplative.”
Q&A: Leader is available for Q&A, and opens it up to the group
where appropriate.
SOLITUDE
Modifying suggestions for a time
ON
YOUR OWN (Homework):
Assignments for the following week are included along with questions to
prepare them to explore the topic of prayer and God’s creation.
WEEK
9: Exploring the Great Outdoors
[Correlates with Chapter 7 in The Contemplative Mom.]
SMALL GROUP
Contemplative Report/Review
After reviewing how obedience and an awareness of God’s instruction
and commandments affect us on a daily, moment-by-moment basis, participants
will begin to discuss their thoughts on nature and outdoor life. There
are many nature-lovers who enjoy state parks and hiking and so on. There
are also plenty of moms who prefer comfy hotels to rugged campgrounds
and pay for landscaping instead of digging a vegetable garden. These differences
alone may spark lively conversation in small groups. Leaders may be warned
that “camps,” so to speak, could form. If participants aren’t
encouraged to understand the other side, it may be hard for different
personalities to relate to each other. Finding compassion and common ground
will be important to combat this potential tension.
IDEAS
& ACTIVITIES
Depending on the style and mood of the group, additional games and activities
might be appropriate for either the large or small group. Leaders can
pick and choose from suggestions included here that would be suitable
for the topic of the week. These can serve as an opener, add a little
light-hearted humor or simply be a non-traditional conversation starter.
Examples follow:
- Play “Every Season,” cut #10 on Nichole Nordeman’s CD “This Mystery.” Discuss how nature has inspired this musician to appreciate her spiritual transformation.
- Sing or play the hymn “Fairest Lord Jesus,” “How Great Thou Art,” and/or “This Is My Father’s World.”
- Read Ann’s essay “Trees,” included in text.
- Pass out a natural item (flowers, stones, small pieces of interesting wood with the bark still on it, birch curls, sweetgum balls, pine cones, or maple tree whirligigs). Ask moms to select one to have on her lap or hold during the large group discussion as a sample of one small piece of God’s creation to ponder, appreciating something of His attention to detail and astonishing creativity.
- Show a nature video or slide show (Moody video online http://www.moodyvideo.org/devo.htm and other resources will be provided).
LARGE
GROUP
PowerPoint possibilities:
Earth’s crammed with heaven
and every common bush afire with God.
And only those who see
take off their shoes.
The rest sit round and pluck blackberries.
Elizabeth Barrett Browning
A section will be included with “thoughts from the author”
or “thoughts from a fellow contemplative.”
Q&A: Leader is available for Q&A, and opens it up to the group
where appropriate.
SOLITUDE
For this week’s time of solitude, and weather permitting, participants
may be given the option of heading outdoors for a time of interacting
with the Lord in a natural setting. Even in urban settings, a light breeze,
some fluffy clouds, or a few puddles gleaming in the sunlight may add
depth of experience during the course itself. Participants use videos
or natural items as journal-prompts, pondering the creativity and power
of the Creator.
ON
YOUR OWN (Homework)
Assignments for the following week are included along with questions to
prepare them to explore the topic of prayer and experiencing community.
WEEK
10: Experiencing Community
[Correlates with Chapter 8 in The Contemplative Mom]
SMALL GROUP
Contemplative Report/Review
This week, and after logging so much time together, the moms of the study
hopefully will have experienced community firsthand. Small groups will
offer words of encouragement and gratitude to each other, with space and
opportunity to share honestly their needs. The group may decide together
on a plan to serve each other the following weeks, perhaps sharing babysitting
or helping each other with a project, gathering for a shared interest
(like scrapbooking) or simply enjoying a special outing. Ideas generated
in the group can ensure greater ownership and enthusiasm for the idea.
Small group leaders will also supply a jar full of rough stones. Each
participant selects one that she likes, and hangs onto it. Connection
and explanation is merely referencing the rock polisher analogy in the
chapter of The Contemplative Mom.
IDEAS
& ACTIVITIES
Depending on the style and mood of the group, additional games and activities
might be appropriate for either the large or small group. Leaders can
pick and choose from suggestions included here that would be suitable
for the topic of the week. These can serve as an opener, add a little
light-hearted humor or simply be a non-traditional conversation starter.
- Ask a pastor to lead a special time of communion for the class.
LARGE
GROUP
PowerPoint Slide possibilities:
The first service one owes to others in the fellowship
consists in listening to them.
Just as love of God begins in
listening to His Word,
so the beginning of
love for the brethren is
learning to listen to them.
It is God's love for us
that He not only gives us His Word
but lends us His ear.
So it is His work that we do
for our brother when we learn to listen to him.
Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Life Together
This week, the leader contrasts seasons of isolation or needs unmet because of lack of community with positive community experiences. If there is a special person or group with whom the leader enjoys deep fellowship and community, a great experience would be to prepare a joint message, telling stories of how they grew from not knowing each other well, to trusting each other with a loving friendship that exemplifies authentic community. Elements to bring out: prayer together, serving one another, learning to trust, sharing deeply over time, mistakes and restoration. Opening up for the group to ask questions establishes a vulnerability that makes it possible for others to gain vision for community in their own lives. Other interesting variations might be to illustrate a long-distance friendship with letters read from the front. A section will be included with “thoughts from the author” or “thoughts from a fellow contemplative.”
Gift to hand out to the group: Rough stones from small group reminds them of the analogy in The Contemplative Mom about rocks in rock polisher. At the end of the large group, after exploring the tough times of her own relationships, the leader passes out a polished stone for each participant (found inexpensively at craft and education stores). Participants then have two stones to show the current process and rough state, and the polished, gleaming future promise that the Lord will use relational strife in our lives to perfect us.
Q&A: Leader is available for Q&A, and opens it up to the group where appropriate
SOLITUDE
After communion, participants retreat to their “spots” for
a time of solitude. They are encouraged to use the two rocks they received
and their time of communion as a “prompt” for their journals
and prayer time, talking with and listening to God regarding relationships
and community (or lack thereof) in their lives.
ON
YOUR OWN (Homework)
Read the last chapter in the book, answer the questions in the companion,
and contact anyone whose name came to mind during solitude. Be ready to
report back on how that conversation went.
WEEK
11: A Love Like No Other
[Correlates with Chapter 9 in The Contemplative Mom]
SMALL GROUP
Contemplative Report/Review
Questions relating to both last and this week’s topic will be discussed.
IDEAS
& ACTIVITIES
Depending on the style and mood of the group, additional games and activities
might be appropriate for either the large or small group. Leaders can
pick and choose from suggestions included here that would be suitable
for the topic of the week. These can serve as an opener, add a little
light-hearted humor or simply be a non-traditional conversation starter.
- Sing or play the hymn “Immortal, Invisible God Only Wise.”
- Spend time in worship, if possible, using music or walking the class through A-C-T-S (and L) spending a large portion of time on adoration.
LARGE
GROUP
A section will be included with “thoughts from the author”
or “thoughts from a fellow contemplative.”
Q&A: Leader is available for Q&A, and opens it up to the group
where appropriate.
SOLITUDE
An explanation of A-C-T-S (and L) may offer some moms a format to use
during their solitude.
ON
YOUR OWN (Homework)
Homework this week will include reviewing journals over the past weeks,
listing the things that have changed in your life as a result of God’s
work in your life during this study (increased solitude and awareness
of God’s presence, etc.). Write a mini-testimonial about how God
has ministered to you during this study.
WEEK
12: Testimonials
Testimonials, “Where do we go from here?” How do we live the
contemplative life over the long haul? The groups may enjoy a party to
celebrate the community formed. Share stories of change.
SAMPLE
CHAPTER
Week 5: Divine Companionship
[Correlates with Chapter 3 in The Contemplative Mom]
SMALL
GROUP
Contemplative Report/Review
- Before this course, what images used to come to mind when you thought of solitude? How have they changed after the last week?
- What’s your biggest hurdle to finding solitude?
- What has surprised you about the contemplative life as you read or talk with others?
- Describe what you’ve experienced or changed in your life in the past week, and the resulting consequences.
- Is there anything you’d like to follow up regarding last week’s topic of solitude and “time alone”? If so, share it with the group. Your fellow moms can celebrate the successes and address your thoughts and concerns.
When you finished reading Chapter 3 in The Contemplative Mom, one of your assignments was to jot a few thoughts for the following questions. Share a few of your answers with your small group and discuss your observations, revelations, or ideas:
- After reading this chapter, I will be doing this differently in my life:
- This really moved me:
- I really disagreed with/didn’t understand this:
- What I would really like to discuss with the small group next week is:
- I sense
God is telling me:
The following assignments were given to choose from last week. Share which you chose and your follow-up thoughts on the experience. - This week, pick one day to keep note of how often you do (or don’t) interact with the Lord throughout your day. At the end of the day, review your notes. Surprised?
- Pick the thing that seems most insignificant—yet most troubling—in your life. Talk with the Lord about it several times throughout one day.
- Make a list of some multi-sensory reminders of God you already have in your life.
- Incorporate
one multi-sensory reminder into your life this week to remind yourself
of God’s presence. When you remember His presence:
»praise Him for His power and omnipresence
»ask Him for help
»thank Him for His love for you - Fast part of one day or one full day this week. At the end of the day, write a few thoughts down about it.
- Write down five good things that happen this week (or if you feel ambitious, five things per day), and thank God for them.
- Choose one task you usually hate doing, and ask God to join you as you do it. Try to become more aware of His presence, power, encouragement, and gratitude for your faithfulness to do small things with great love.
- Let the Lord lead you to one thing you could do as an act of service for someone this week. After doing it, write a short note about your experience in your journal.
IDEAS
& ACTIVITIES
The following ideas for activities can be used in your small or large
group time, or even in your individual contemplative experience at home.
Use them as creative sparks for how you can add flexibility to your relationship
with the Lord. Remember that the goal is just that: relationship. These
suggestions are merely a means to an end.
- Set a timer to go off repeatedly throughout the study (on the half-hour, every 15 minutes). Each time it beeps, everyone pauses. Leaders may offer a few suggestions for what might be said/thought/prayed during that pause, or leave it up to the individual to decide for herself.
- Ask the leader or small group leaders to bring in a bag of reminders in their lives that keep them connected with God throughout a day. Set up a display for people to see as they walk in.
- Hang posters made by children around the walls of the room where you meet. The artwork could be Bible stories read to children who interpret them visually. This could be coordinated with a Sunday school class.
- Find something that would be a reminder for one of the senses, and then give it away at the end of this week’s study. Attach a strip of paper with Scripture references that expand the meaning. If you give out candles, for example, find passages that speak of the Lord as our light, or Scripture as a light. Pass out a natural item like acorns with Isaiah 61:3 “They will be called oaks of righteousness.”
- Purchase postcards in quantity online of da Vinci’s “The Last Supper” to pass out.
- Dig up a field lily or buy a lily for each mom she can plant in her garden, and print out simple labels for each pot with Matthew 6:28-30 (why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow…)
- Read p. 49-51 in Currents of the Heart: Glimpses of God in the Stream of Life, by Gigi Graham Tchividjian. It is an excerpt from the diary of a French maid in the 17th Century. It is a powerful illustration of staying aware of God’s divine presence and love in the midst of the mundane.
- Sing or play the hymn “I Need Thee Every Hour.”
LARGE
GROUP
PowerPoint slide possibilities:
1. If Christ does not reign over the mundane events in our lives,
He does not reign at all.
Dr. Paul Tripp
2. Divine Companionship
1. Multi-sensory reminders of God
2. God’s reminders to us
3. Inviting God to keep you company
4. Keeping God Company
3. "Let us believe that God is in all our simple deeds and learn
to find Him there."
A.W. Tozer
Thoughts from a Fellow Contemplative
God is here. In our midst.
This morning as you packed the diaper bag, ran your fingers through your bangs and swiped a little color across your lips, God was there.
As you glugged down your orange juice, wrestled the toddler into his car seat, raced through a yellow light and sat in line at the McDonald’s drive-through, God was there, too.
Now you’re here, and God is here, too. The I AM…is.
Right here.
Sometimes it’s hard to believe that. Sometimes it feels like He’s only in the stained-glass chapel down the road, or in that little private space you carved out for yourself in your bedroom with the chair and your Bible and journal. Or maybe you feel like He just follows your pastor around.
He’s
here, all right, for the good and the bad, when you smiled and when you
swore, when you forgot about Him and when you remembered Him.
And that’s a key for us to increase intimacy with God: remembering.
All day long He’s with you and me in the “kingdoms” we influence and impact. We may feel more like the servants than the rulers in our kingdom, but we still have a domain. We are not to “rule” or influence or do anything in our domain apart from the true King, so the Lord—the King—has given us the privilege of His constant availability, in and around us. But we need to remember that He is available. We need to remember to turn to Him continually.
In The Divine Conspiracy, Dallas Willard writes that God “pursues us redemptively and invites us individually, every last one of us, to be faithful to him in the little we truly ‘have say over.’ There, at every moment, we live in the interface between our lives and God’s kingdom among us.” (p. 23-24, The Divine Conspiracy)
He describes the life of Frank Laubach, founder of the World Literacy Crusade, who experimented with how he might live in a literal minute-by-minute submission to the Lord. Willard writes, “In January of 1930 he began to cultivate the habit of turning his mind to Christ for one second out of every minute.”
Willard continues, “After only four weeks [Laubach] reported, ‘I feel simply carried along each hour, doing my part in a plan which is far beyond myself. This sense of cooperation with God in little things is what so astonishes me, for I never have felt it this way before. I need something, and turn round to find it waiting for me. I must work, to be sure, but there is God working along with me.’”
Willard concludes by saying that Laubach was “forever and foremost Christ’s man” and attributed his brilliant ideas, boundless energy and effective impact from his “practice of constant conscious interface with God.” (p. 24)
Living that constant interface with God requires the discipline of turning our thoughts and hearts to God. But one second out of every minute? How can we possibly connect that often?
Try an experiment. Start by setting an alarm to go off every hour. At the sound of the alarm, “interface” with the Lord. Talk to Him; pray. Write a note on your calendar to increase the frequency of your alarm to every half hour after a couple of weeks. Follow that by an increase to ten or fifteen minutes. See how frequently you can talk with the Lord by training yourself with this timer (a countdown-return feature on a sports watch can help with this, though it may not go over well in an office setting or while checking a sleeping baby).
Start in class today! Set a timer to ring at 15-minute intervals. No matter what is happening, even if the leader is talking or small groups are enjoying a laugh, let that bell or alarm cause everyone to pause. Stop for that moment and pray to the Beloved. After that brief pause, return to whatever you were doing.
Frequent connection with the Lord will awaken your inmost comprehension of His love and His desire to accompany you through life. Appreciating and acting on God’s divine companionship may be yet another component of the contemplative life that helps you to rely utterly on Him and become “forever and foremost Christ’s woman.”
Q&A: During a time of questions and answers, you and your leader can explore the four areas of divine companionship outlined in The Contemplative Mom. If you’re working alone, you can use Q&A time as a chance to phone a friend and talk about what you’re learning, mutually encouraging one another. You could pursue a mentor from the ladies you interviewed during Panel week, and use her as a resource for your contemplative growth.
Suggestions
for Solitude
Your time of solitude is yours to use however you wish. The time is our
gift to you; how you use it is up to you. If you would like to use your
journal as a means of focusing and connecting with the Lord, you can go
back to some of the questions you didn’t have time to explore earlier
this week, or you can go through the following questions and respond as
you feel led.
Journal Prompt
- Frank Laubach was described by Dallas Willard and “forever and foremost Christ’s man.” How do you respond to that phrase? What would it take for you to become “forever and foremost Christ’s woman”?
- “Lord, please give me one multi-sensory reminder of You that I can incorporate into my life today.”
- Pick a journal page to list the pennies/clues/letters dropt from God in the past two days.
- “What does it mean for me to keep You company, Father? How can I walk with You today?”
Study
section
How do the following verses and questions amplify your understanding of
God’s omnipresence, omniscience and ownership of your life? Consider
how their truth might help you embrace the reality of God’s desire
for companionship with you in everyday moments.
For a man’s
ways are in full view of the LORD,
and he examines all his paths. (Proverbs 5:22)
The eyes
of the LORD are everywhere,
keeping watch on the wicked and the good. (Proverbs 15:3)
[The LORD declares] “My eyes are on all their ways; they are not hidden from me, nor is their sin concealed from my eyes.” (Jeremiah 16:17)
“Can anyone hide in secret places so that I cannot see him?” declares the LORD. “Do not I fill heaven and earth?” (Jeremiah 23:24)
- What these say about God’s omnipresence is:
- How this will affect my daily life and interaction with Him, is:
- The way
these verses make me view “divine companionship,” is:
Those who obey his commands live in him, and he in them. And this is how we know that he lives in us: We know it by the Spirit he gave us. (1 John 3:24)
We know that we live in him and he in us, because he has given us of his Spirit. And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in him and he in God. And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. (1 John 4:13-16) - What this says about God’s omnipresence is:
- How this affects my daily life and interaction with Him, is:
- The way this verse makes me view “divine companionship,” is:
ON
YOUR OWN (Homework)
This week, continue to ask the Lord for multi-sensory reminders you can
work into your life. Specifically, continue to experiment with timers
to alert you to pray and interact with the Father.
As you begin reading the next chapter in The Contemplative Mom, try to
find at least one occasion when you can truly pour out your heart to the
Lord.