Don't Want to Bungle Things

My mom wrote me a note in relation to my "Will I do everything" and "Burundi" blogs. She said she was reminded of a quote by Jackie Kennedy when JFK was president and her kids were little. Someone asked her about something she might do, and her reply was, "If you bungle raising your children, I don't think whatever else you do well matters very much." Mom paraphrased the quote (from memory, I might add!), eliminating the odd sentence construction: "If you don't do a good job of raising your children, I don't think it matters much what else you do."

There are lots of ways to do a good job raising children. I think it could be done well in Burundi, though unconventionally (from a North American perspective) and not without risk. But Mom sure knows how to help me feel good about weekends filled with pancake breakfasts, soccer games, and watching Hub running alongside The Boy who is learning to ride a two-wheeler.

I imagine Mom is tempted--whether subconsciously or consciously--to convince me to stay nearby. It's a little easier to celebrate birthdays and Christmas when we're on the same continent. But I do agree that Jackie O's quote is a great reminder that my obvious calling of the moment is to raise my children well, however and wherever we continue the task. Until otherwise notified, I guess that means right here on the cul-de-sac in our suburban neighborhood.

When we bought this house seven years ago, I had instant buyer's remorse. I actually cried, feeling guilty, because the house was so big. I thought we'd been too greedy. Within a week of buying the house, I prayed, "Lord, we'll sell it right now if we've done the wrong thing."

I didn't hear a voice from heaven, and I sometimes worry that I'm hearing my own voice instead of God's, but I felt like the response was something along the lines of this: I appreciate your sensitivity and willingness to downsize, but I've given you this house to enjoy. If I take it away or ask you to move at any time--next week or ten years from now--I want you to stay open-handed about it like you are right now. Either way, it's technically my house. Use it however I ask. Until I tell you otherwise, relax and enjoy it as a gift from me.

When I think about doing whatever God wants me to do, I remember this, uh, interaction, if that's what it can be called. I think it's a pretty good attitude: stay open to change, be willing to sacrifice for God's calling and kingdom, and pay attention in case He's trying to get through to me. But if God doesn't say to change anything, relax and enjoy the current situation and make the most of it.

Reminds me of Paul's words, when he said, "I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want" (Philippians 4:12). And he was pretty good about doing whatever God wanted him to do. As I mentioned earlier, I'm reading in Acts, and I forgot about the episode where he was dragged out of the city because they thought he was dead. Then he got up and went back in! He definitely went a n y w h e r e God wanted him to go, but other times would stay for a while in one place to encourage believers, when that's what God wanted.

So I guess at the moment I find myself open to God, willing to take risks--even though I'm a wimp (a nice deal for wimps is that when I lean on Him in my wimpy weakness, God gets to show his power. His power is made perfect in weakness, and when I'm weak, then I am strong...in Christ)--and hopeful that I won't bungle motherhood.